A Rant: in four parts.

PART I:
i wish that i had something more interesting to talk about. but i don't.
i wish i was an interesting person.
i wish i was doing something tonight.
i wish i was done with this place.
i wish i was a 95 year old black man from montgomery, alabama.

ok so maybe i don't really want to be a 95 year old black man from montgomery alabama. however if i were, i think that would explain my addiction to big band music, and my love for ella fitzgerlad. if i were a 95 year old black man i could think about being in love with ella fitzgerald and her amazingly hypnotic voice. but as it is i am a 21 year old female WASP from oak harbor, ohio. and as it is i don't contemplate being in love with ella fitzgerald, but i am in love with her amazingly hypnotic voice. i can't get enough.

PART II:
i think that if i were to perhaps listen to her enough, then maybe somehow i can be transported to another time, to another place, to another culture. one that i am far more equipped for. one that i fit into. one that i would love. back to a time when amateur night at the apollo was more than a stop on a japanese tourist map, but a launching platform for some of the greats, like miss ella fitzgerald. back to a time when modesty and fashion were interwoven. but as it is i resort to obnoxious copy cats like american idol, and i applaud women who were a bra, and some how over look the fact that they forgot to wear a shirt.

PART III:
it seems that our culture has lost something over the past 75 years. i am terrified of the world that i will raise my children in. thanks to opera and montel i know who lingers around the corner of my child's school. i can name at least 7 different types of household molds that could possibly kill or at very best seriously mame my child. thanks to television i am also terrified of ANGRY CANADIAN COWS, and a small pox epidemic that i was warned about on that one doctor show...i'm not sure which one it was but i know that i saw it on like four different stations so it must be a real threat. i'm also terrified a terrorist coming to oak harbor with blue prints of the nuclear power plant, but don't fear PETA will be satisfied because then Davis Besse won't make any three eyed fish like i saw on that one show...what was it...oh yeah the simpsons.

PART IV:
ugh. i don't even know what i am typing about anymore. ok i don't want to rant anymore about things that have been said a thousand times. especially when no one actually cares about it. i suppose if we as a society actually cared about the deterioration of our civilization we would take some steps to rectify it, but as it is i don't see that as the case. so i suppose that i will simply do as i'm told:
1. Be angry with the deterioration of our moral values.
2. Be sure to immerse myself in enough evil that i will be scared shitless.
3. Speak loudly and carry a big stick.
4. Don't Do ANYTHING.