rodeo spaghetti and german potato salad

i drove down roads i new a century ago.
long and straight.
short and curvey.
i know them. i feel their curves, their bumps, their flaws.
i see me riding a raft under the road.
i see jeremy with no eye brows.
i see cory spear fishing in the field.
i hear the scream of the peacock.
the smell of the grass. of the trees. of the wheat.
so familiar. so new. so alive.
yet so different. so dead. just a memory.

and today i'll drive down roads i've never seen.
past fields i've never known.
to a place that is unfamiliar.
with people i do not know.
and i'm scared.
and excited.
and i long to feel the sun on my face, and the grass under my head.
but it will be a different sun, and different grass.
on different skin, and under a new head.
but it will be the same sun, and the same grass.
i've had this skin since i was born. this head since then.
i'm the same. just different. just changing.
i'm going to a different place that is the same.
just different. just changing.
and i'm scared.
and excited.