home.
i nearly had a panic attack at IGA yesterday. not sure why. there were people every where that i recognized. i hated the feeling. i hated it. i think that maybe this is a sign from God. he's saying "Jamie, Thou shall NOT live in Oak Harbor".
and i'm like "SWEET!".
bored.
i'm home and i'm bored. i'm cleaning. earning 1,500 dollars. well sort of. it's more like i'm cleaning my conscience.
happy.
and even though i'm bored, and cleaning, and wanting to die. i'm somehow at ease. especially here. at dad's house. it's so nice outside. there are birds everywhere. the windows are open. the fields are green. it smells like fresh cut grass. fresh cut grass and spring. mmm. that's the best smell. i think i could stay here forever. but only if it was always green. and always spring. and always this moment.
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