it's been a while

so i've recently realized that i'm not really very good at updating this thing. not that it really matters anyway. i guess it was just something that i started up to take up some more of the time that i shouldn't really be wasting......hmmm, i just used really a lot in that sentence. i really think i need to stop using really so much! ha!...........so it's late, not rrrea....i mean....not really! it's only like 12:30 but i am just so exhausted. tomorrow is going to be a really long day....somehow i've let my homework pile up and if i don't get on the ball i'm going to sink into the great abyss of missed assingments!....well maybe not really, but i probably won't do so well in philosophy not to imply that i was doing well to begin with......i haven't really decided why i am wasting my time typing this, it's not like anyone is going to read it, and even if by some stretch of the imagination someone stumbles across my little blog in the vast stretches of the internet....it's not like i'm going to have anything intellectual to say anyway.......i think that some times it is just more fun to be a pessimist. hmmmm.....i think i'm going to go to bed. i'm going to try really hard to wake up tomorrow morning and go to chapel.....but i think that it's going to be hard. sometimes being on a christian campus seems like christianity becomes more about fulfilling a quota then a personal and meaningful relationship with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ...which is why it's hard for me to go and listen to something that God isn't call....just so i can get yelled at and to some extent condemned, all for a stinking chapel credit.....but like i said sometimes it is just more fun to be a pessimist!