Thursday, April 28, 2005

...and you're in college?

i just spent the morning at Thornhill practicing survival/first aid scenarios. and then i got to facilitate the low ropes course. at 1 i get to go do archery. then i'm spending the rest of the evening playing games with kids. i love the life of a rec major!

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Blast from the Past

its strange when you find blogs of friends from high school. and for the most part i use the term "friends" lightly. its weird to read what they are up to, or at the very least what they threw up. i'm glad i decided not to go to BG or UT. i'm glad i left ohio. i'm glad i made new friends. where would i be right now? probably drunk at B-Dubs. i've officially decided that i will not move back to oak harbor. never. i think that part of my life is over. i'm ready to graduate, and move on with my life. i guess a little blast from the past is alright every now and then...but please don't make me live there.

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

i need...

i'm spacing. i need to concentrate. i need to go to bed. i need to figure out my presentation. i need this semester to be over. i need to go to spain. i need a drink.

Monday, April 25, 2005

Chutes Too Narrow

i see to be slightly obsessed with The Shins. and for good reason. at least that's what i think

Sunday, April 24, 2005

as it draws to an end

18 days until the end of the semester

20 days until i go home

24 days until i leave for camp

::::wierd::::

Saturday, April 23, 2005

You put the cyn in cynicism

why am i so cynical? why does huntington mass produce this kind of person? do we take cyn 101? no. we take western civ. and bib hit lit. and understanding the christian faith. and philosophy. we learn how to think. they want us to. that's why we're here. not for job training. not to socialize. not for the perfect christian experience in the perfect christian environment. we're here for an education. to learn how to be analytical. i know that's what i want. i want to be able to think things through. to make up my own mind about something. unfortunately we there is a bi-product to this type of enlightenment: cynicism. i see it in myself. i can't sit through a chapel with out condemning it. i can't sit through a church service without picking it apart. i can't be in a room with the "uber christians" without feeling like sludge. is this really what i wanted? hmm. well what's the opposite? i suppose without this type of education i would be naive. i hate rose colored glasses, and i couldn't imagine being forced to wear them my entire life. what kind of life would that be? seeing the good in everything and ignoring the consequences? i'd hate that. there'd be elves dancing and rainbows and butterflies everywhere. i hate butterflies. there is no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. and elves keep AK 747's in their pointy shoes. But is that what I want? to be bitter and down cast all the time? no. hmph. i guess that the trick is to somehow figure out how to combine the two. to be graciously cynical. i want to be able to see the good and the bad in everything. i guess i just need to be able to have grace and love too. maybe that's what a huntington education is about. to learn how to have grace. to forgive. to see around it. why are they leaving that course out of our education. i don't think i'm getting my bucks worth here. maybe it's a good thing i figured this out before i graduated. now i have one year to try to align my vision. huh. it's tough. i've tried it before and have found myself back where i started. i guess i'll try not to fall of the wagon this time. this is an incoherent entry. i don't know why i'm typing it. i sound like a terrible person. hmm. oh well. you can use your own educated self to make that judgment. i just hope you can show me a little grace. i'll try to do the same for you.

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Pygmalion Rules The World

Discuss your thoughts regarding your reading of the article, “Pygmalion in Management.”

“If managers’ expectations are high, productivity is likely to be excellent. IF their expectations are low, productivity is likely to be poor.” I find it interesting that we as humans, the only species on the planet with the capability of reasonable thought, can be so swayed by the expectations of another person. One would think that with the technology and education that we have today, you would be led to think that self fulfilling prophesy and reverse psychology is the thing of the past, but it is not. I realize that this type of “control” is not limited to business, but I think that having a background knowledge in psychology a manager could be much more effective in leading his subordinates.

What is it that makes a manager create such high performance levels? “The answer, in part, seems to be that superior managers have greater confidence than other managers in their own ability to develop the talents of their subordinates”. What managers believe about themselves directly influences how their subordinates see themselves. This taken into consideration, it seems like superior motivation is cyclical. If Mr. X is a superior manager and he portrays self-confidence and knowledge to such and extent that his subordinates begin to replicate him, then they too will learn how to be self-motivators. If the subordinates are put into a position of leadership, then they will lead as they were led and a new group of subordinates will learn how to lead effectively.

I suppose that this is the idea of how learning and leadership should work. If more employees are becoming superior motivators and they are creating more superior employees, then it seems logical that Darwin’s Survival of the Fittest theory should be more than recognizable here (even if it is only noticeable in one company). Assuming that a company would only promote subordinates of a superior caliber, it logically leads that all employees will one day be taught to be superior. Perhaps in some strange way this means that Pygmalion is taking over the world! Or maybe not, but if we know how to train our employees to be superior and thus increasing productivity and quality, then why not? I don’t think that I would mind a Pygmalion run world…except for maybe the mind control and stuff, but that really is a minuet detail.

What if we were to use this tactic sooner in life. What if we taught our grade schoolers using this method? I suppose that it would logically reveal that our drop-out rate would decrease, and college attendance would increase. That would mean that there would be more qualified people entering the workforce, and more qualified people to work in and run companies, therefore making them far more superior. Although, if there were twice as many people competing for the same job, that would potentially mean that there would be twice as many people without work, and twice as many people on unemployment, and our economy would drop exponentially. If that happens inflation would sky rocket, and no one would be able to purchase any of the products or services that the superior graduates produced, and so there would be lay offs and more people would lose their jobs. I guess that means that we don’t want Pygmalion to run the world. WHEW! that was a close call!

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In case you were wondering...i did turn this paper in. MWHAHAHAHAHA!

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

a rather simple epitaph

just when i think i have it all figured out, another door opens up and i'm left where i started. SAB or no SAB. Not for Profit or no Not for Profit. Both will give me internship possibilities. Both will give me great experience. I already have experience in both. I kind of want to do both. But i don't want to actually do both at the SAME TIME. Hmph. what to do. (sigh). thanks mike, i'm glad you opened my eyes to this. that's not sarcasim either. i really am glad you told me about it!

the apartment. i think it's ours. aug-july. we wouldn't be there for aug of this year and i probably won't be there for most of may-july of next year. but it's so much cheaper. and the freedom. oh how i heart freedom. everything seems to be falling in place. now i just need a loan for next semester. and a bed. oh, and to be approved for off campus housing. that would be good. come on ron coffee! I'm AMAZING...you should approve me!!!

::on a different note::
it's raining outside. i have the window open. it smells amazing. i love spring. and i'm really diggin After Hours by Rilo Kiley. and Young Pilgrims by The Shins. I think if i play that song one more time carla might pull my toe nails out. but i love it. i think i'll take the chance AHHH... Thunder. Spring is here. it's raining. i want to go outside and run in it. roll in it. splash in it. live in it. it makes me think of summer storms. tornado warnings and hail. getting paid for watching tv. i love that we have memories. that we cling to them. that they can bring us joy. i feel melancholy, in a good way. oh i want to be outside. i wish we could always be wet. that would be the best. too bad.


:::::PS:::::
I DID IT! i stood in the rain. i'm wet, and cold, and happy. mmm, i love the rain!

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

sympathy and laughing gas.

matt showed us how to swallow a toothpick during a meeting.
i laughed.
chrissy mimicked a drunk person while watching tv.
i laughed.
jenny imitated a falling tree on our nature hike.
i laughed, so hard i cried.

i think i need to learn how to be sympathetic. or at least fake it. that might be good, but less funny.

a summary?

i can almost sit down and breath.
just a few more hours.
just a few more days.
just a few more weeks.

then its done.
no more papers.
no more tests.
no more.

and then it starts.
i can't wait.
bring it!

Monday, April 18, 2005

wait for it!...WAIT FOR IT!!

Your neighbor is pruning his tree, his daughter is mowing the lawn. A big bird swoops down dive bombs your tree climbing neighbor. Your neighbor looses his balance and falls to the ground. Meanwhile, his daughter is distracted by a shiny object and does not see her father lying on the ground. She runs over his foot cutting off his pinky toe. You hear a blood curdling scream and run to investigate. What do you do?

AHHHHH!

so much to say...but no time to say it!

Friday, April 15, 2005

an excerpt from carla's paper.

"they're a picture perfect family (just a little uglier than normal)"

Thursday, April 14, 2005

i'm suffering

from....idon'twanttodomyhomeworkitis.
Symptoms:
A sudden increase in cleaning.
The intense desire to write a novel.
Sore index finger from surfing the net.
A bruised forehead from repeated smashes to a hard surface.

Remedy:
An all nighter.

great.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

nostalgia

my entry from exactly one year ago today.

that's right
here's a something i said recently:
"I'm a recluse.......a recluse and PROUD OF IT!"

funny how things never really change. just this year i said:
"i think i'll just become a hermit, and live in a cave in the woods. that way i can make friends with all of the woodland creatures before i shoot them and skin them and make them in to a lovely stew."

apparently the only thing that has changed has been my desire to be funny. hmmm. i think i'm almost ok with that. just wait till next april 13. maybe something will be different then.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

butt thumping...like tub thumping

someone should teach my roommate that if you don't fart your guts will EXPLODE!

Monday, April 11, 2005

my only rebuttal

i like to use swearsies

i will not.

i'm updating because she is forcing me to.
i have a gun at my head and a knife at my throat.
i need to write this crap other wise she will punch me in the face.
oh, oh, oh, i don't want to get punched in the face.

she told me to write that.
she sang it at me, and forced me to pen it.
but i will not.
i will not do something against my own will.
i will not.
i will not.
i will not.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

april showers bring may flowers!

today was a beautiful day.
i planted flowers,
and took a nap,
and tied knots outside,
and played with kids,
and heard a band.
and realized that maybe my classes are a little different than most.
and maybe my job is a little more relaxed than most.
and maybe i like it a whole lot more!

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

jmebarrett's Xanga Site

i think i'm suffering from senioritis. i'm only a junior.
i just want to be done.
to have a job.
to have a career.
to move out of indiana.
to move out of ohio.
to move away from michigan.
to live in washington.
to live in oregon.
or the napa valley.
or colorado.
or new york.
or maine.
or Massachusetts.
or new hampshire.
or.
or.
or
or
or
or.

Monday, April 04, 2005

over heard at the salon last night...

my name is francesco. i like to wear tight pants and saunter.

Sunday, April 03, 2005

brain farts and senior moments

i think i did something dumb. but i can't remember. but i think i did. i mean there is proof that a wrong doing occurred. and my name is attached to it. but i don't know what i did. i don't remember. not at all. maybe my subconscious has blocked it out. maybe it was so offensive that i don't even want to remember it. it makes me want to cry. maybe i'm being framed. it's sad that i don't remember. it's sad that no one has really said that i did something wrong. but i saw the receipt. it's there. in blue and yellow. but i don't remember. and now i feel dumb. and evil. and my stomach is churning. and my heart is burning. but i don't know why. i don't want to cry, it's dumb. i'm sorry to you that i did something dumb to. i can honestly say i didn't mean it. and that i don't remember it.

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ani defranco singing When Doves Cry is a tragedy. i cringe more when she sings it than i do when i hear prince. i think that the barenaked ladies maybe the only band that i have ever heard perform it well. very well in fact.

Saturday, April 02, 2005

good mood catalysts

-the shins
-ani defranco
-eisley
-bright eyes
-saturdays

i guess today has the makings of a very good day!